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Facebook ruined my dress
By Kyla Cornish
I wear a lot of black.
I don’t mean to.
Well, I guess I do mean to. I just like the colour. It has nothing to do with it being slimming.
Not a damn thing.
I’m lying. But, you knew that already.
Last year I was asked to co emcee our local Business Excellence Awards. It was in April so I wanted something springy to wear so I headed off to Penningtons and bought this dress…
And then I posted this photo on Facebook.
FYI: I SWEAR I BRUSHED MY HAIR.
Any who…
Then I had a wedding to go to in August and I wore this dress…
And because my husband was three provinces away and the kids looked so cute, I took this photo and posted it to my Facebook page to show my husband how adorable his family looked before we headed off to a wedding.
Then our friend from college was getting married this September and I decided again to, yes, wear this dress…
And then as usual I posted it to Facebook.
I had another event two weeks later and realized, that CRAP ON A CRACKER I cannot wear the dress. I need a new dress. My Facebook posting of this dress had ruined the dress. I have ruined the shelf life of the dress.
I only owned it for five months, wore it three times and posted it on Facebook three times and blogged about it one time.
Good bye sweet dress.
So the dress is officially for sale…
Size 1 x dress
Danced in 3x
Spilled wine on 2x
Spilled beer on 1x
Sweated profusely in 2x
Travelled from B.C. to Manitoba 2x
Crumpled on a pile on the floor 3x and only 1x was for a good reason.
Boom Chicka Wow Wow.
– Kyla Cornish is a “retired” radio Dj adjusting to being a Momma of two children. Main problems? Lack of sex, sleep sanity and an addiction to saucy chicken wings. Kyla has been published in a series of funny blogger ebooks, “Life Well Blogged.” She has also been recognized as one of the Top 25 Funny Moms in Canada and US by Circle of Moms. Then she was kicked out of that contest for cheating. She also won a baking competition when she was 11 at a 4-H Rally. Find Kyla here: http://www.mommysweird.com and follow on twitter @mommyisweird