By Deb Elliott

I am in a battle against the addiction that I have allowed to beat me for the past 37 years and holy crap, I’m not going to lie, it has been tough.

I haven’t become the monster we all fear we will become…at least not publicly but more to the point I am thinking about it CONSTANTLY! And yes dammit, I have cheated…I am so sorry to disappoint all of the wonderful people who are supporting me but I can assure you that it was just a wee slip. I will not try to justify it as I think it just sounds lame. And believe me, no one is beating me up over it more than myself. It would be easier to just fake it…yes, lie…but that’s not right and would defeat the whole purpose of sharing my journey. This is the cold hard truth of it all. It’s a frigging struggle and it pisses me off to no end that it is.

So today is a new day and I am choosing to think of all of the fabulous reasons why I am doing this instead of letting my addiction lead me to think that this is soooo hard. I have done mental and emotional battle before and pride myself on being one tough bitch…who would have thought that I would be my own toughest opponent?

More to come and I promise no gaps in my entries because I feel like a dumb ass!

Article Share