“Perceptions,” by Gerry Warner

Op-Ed Commentary

What is the most controversial issue in the world today?

The war in Ukraine? Abortion? Ex-president Donald Trump occupying the Oval Office again? Should Prince Harry and Meghan Markle attend the coronation of King Charles the Third? Will the Vancouver Canucks ever win the Stanley Cup?

There’s a lot of disagreement and controversy in the above, but even collectively they pale in comparison to the most controversial issue on the planet – Daylight Saving Time. (DST).

Yes, as Canadians, not to mention millions of others in the world, go to sleep March 11, many will grit their teeth, reach for their clock and endure the twice-a-year ritual again. But many – I would venture to say most of them – will be unhappy about it and probably wake up with a headache again.

Many will head off to work exhausted and more than a little angry about doing this yet another time. Some, dozing at the wheel, may even have an automobile accident and injure themselves or die, according to traffic officials around the world. But they’ll do it because DST is the law. And who wants to take on The Law when they’re in a bad mood?

So, are we stuck with DST forever? At the moment, it looks like we are because even though many efforts to end DST have been made by dozens of world governments, including the B.C. NDP, the end of the bi-annual clock change appears nowhere in sight. Surely that doesn’t speak well for the state of our civilization when we can’t even agree on what time it is?

No wonder the Ukrainian war rages on. No wonder, God help us, Trump has a chance of becoming president again. And will the Duke and Duchess of Sussex ever get back in the good graces of the British Royal Family again? Not likely. And will a Canadian team ever win the Stanley Cup again? Equally unlikely. So where do we go from here?

I can hear some of you saying abolish the monarchy. You won’t get a big argument out of me on that one although the royals pack a high level of entertainment value for all of us and it would be a far duller world without them. They’re also good for the economy because all their scandals and shenanigans inspire salacious movies and pot-boiler books that brings in badly needed revenue for the publishing and film industries.

As for the Canucks winning Lord Stanley’s famous trophy and Trump returning to the White House, not in my lifetime or yours. Both should be sent to the penalty box and ordered to stay there for life.

So how do we solve the DST conundrum?

I say a special kind of person with supernatural skills and international experience is needed for such an onerous and  monumental task. It would have to be someone with great negotiating skills. Someone who could talk endlessly without really saying anything. Someone who could be devious and polite at the same and who knows when to wear a mask and when not to and can make a commitment with one hand while taking it away with the other.

This person must be able to suck and blow at the same time and apologize with passion if necessary and would apologize for anything if so demanded.

Such a person should be sent to the United Nations to convince the world to end Daylight Saving Time once and for all. Yes, the Great Apologizer, Justin Trudeau, could make such an apology and I challenge anyone to suggest someone who could do it better.

– Gerry Warner is a retired journalist, who some might say should apologize more often himself.

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