By Deb Elliott

You’d think I would be keeping track! Truthfully, I haven’t or more like loosely by the amount of patches I have used. And if you include a U.S. trip in which I forgot my trusty little friends that would make it about 23 days! That is pretty darn good by my standards and I am glad it is making the people who care about me so happy!

That’s quite a statement isn’t it? What about how happy it’s making me? Okay… I am still waiting for the elation that comes with the freedom. I know it’s there because about a gazillion former smokers have told me it is! I know the big transformation is coming because I notice things now… like how blatantly evident it is when someone has just had a smoke. Wow can you ever smell it! I cringe when I think of all the times I had a ‘quick smoke’ before picking up the kids or going in a meeting or appointment and didn’t realize what I smelled like!

Now I know if I was still smoking and I was reading this it wouldn’t faze me. Nothing fazes a smoker and that is yet another testament to the power of this addiction… if you are a smoker reading this, it is not intended to make you feel bad or to be a little dig into your conscience. Lord knows we do that to ourselves enough! I am just being honest about my observations and feelings during this journey into the unknown! Or at least it’s so long ago since I was ‘clean’ that I really don’t know life at all as a non-smoker!

And so with each passing day I have waited to write in to say how utterly amazing I feel and how this is the greatest thing I have ever done for myself and blah blah blah… sadly, beyond the triumph of making it through another day without my old back-stabbing buddy, I have felt none of those things – yet! I will, however, persevere! I must because I made it all public and if I went back now and the cigarettes didn’t kill me, Uncle Cliff would and I would disappoint my Mom who has been clean now for three years and she smoked a helluva lot longer than I did!

Oh! Pauline, keep up the good work my fellow quitter! And anyone else out there, let’s just do this thing! Maybe we can plan a big par-tay in a few months with all the money we save… I have heard many times that we will save enough to go to Mexico! See, now that’s thinking positive! Maybe next week will be the week of revelation!

Until then, I will keep on keeping on!

Deb Elliott, of Cranbrook, is a brave soul is making her quitting smoking a public thing through the digital pages of e-KNOW.

Article Share