By S/Sgt. Marko Shehovac

Fraud alert

Still getting kind regards from David Huffman in the mail wanting your help to get $4.3 million into your account. Many people with the same name as yours are dying in his country. Very sad.

Escorted out

At 2 a.m. on April 16, Columbia Valley RCMP Detachment officers were called out to a disturbance complaint on Wolf Crescent to assist with evicting an unwelcome male. On attendance police escorted a 51-year-old male back to his own residence.

Golf cart stolen

At 1 p.m. on April 16, a report of a 2008 Club Car-Golf cart was reported stolen from a driveway located in the 1900 block of Park Drive in Windermere.

Collision with deer at Brisco

At 1:13 p.m. on April 16, Columbia Valley Detachment received a report of an accident involving a 2014 VW versus a deer on Highway 95 near Szabo Road in Brisco. No injuries to the driver; under $1,000 damage.

Ticket issued; meeting adjourned

At 1 a.m. on April 17, while on patrol in the downtown area, Cst. Myers came across multiple males in and around a pickup on 7th Ave. As he approached the area some of the males on foot walked away. Four males in the truck were observed to be in possession of open liquor. Cst. Myers addressed the four males, advising them that today’s lesson would be about democracy in action. He informed the group that rather than give everyone a ticket for open liquor they will form up a meeting and strike an agenda with only one topic. Topic: which of the four they decide will get the ticket. After some deliberation and debate a 21-year-old male came forward and announced that it was a close vote but he got nominated to be the sacrificial lamb. Ticket was issued and the meeting was adjourned.

Two-vehicle accident in Invermere

At 4:04 p.m. on April 17, the detachment responded to a two-vehicle accident on 7th Avenue. A 70-year-old male from Invermere, operating a 2012 Ford F150, collided into a 2002 Ford Taurus driven by a 34-year-old male from Invermere. The driver of the F150 was issued a ticket for fail to yield. No injuries.

Should have stayed away from the bar

At 11 p.m. on April 18, two males were observed walking on Laurier St. A 32-year-old male from Cranbrook was observed to stagger onto the road while walking with a friend. Both were informed to go home and no walking to the bar. Eleven minutes later both were observed walking towards the bar. The intoxicated male was lodged in cells for being drunk in public and released the next morning with a ticket for drunk in public. The friend was found to have a warrant for obstruct police out of Elk Valley and arrested.

Surfing kite stolen

At 9:20 a.m. on April 20, the detachment received a complaint of theft of a surfing kite at Windermere Beach. The kite is described as a red and black 2009 Liquid Force Havoc, 12 meters in length.

There is a time and place

You would think that I would never advocate in a domestic situation of a wife yelling and screaming at her spouse, but in fact there is a time and place where I would highly recommend some yelling and screaming.

If I were called to any such disturbance as I am about to explain, I would defend the wife should the husband object. Strange advice from a seasoned police officer.

To my many supporters over the last six years, you have come to realize that I got my dream boat. Got it home this weekend and had to back up into a tight spot next to a stone wall. I instructed Bev to get out of the truck and guide me in and give me hand and verbal commands, ie. yell out any potential impacts given the tight area to maneuver.

When we men do it, it is with clear hand signals and loud commands. Maybe I should have given clearer instructions.

I back up and I hear a crunching noise. I look and see panic hands waving and a loud announcement, “OK, YOU HIT THE WALL AND BENT THE CORNER OF THE TRAILER AND BROKE THE TAIL LIGHT.”

When I lose it and ask why she didn’t yell, she responds she did but my window was up. Was not.

I showed off the boat to a friend the other day and pointed out the damage Bev did.

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